Faking Tourette’s?

Tourette’s is a difficult condition to live with. One thing that makes it even more challenging is the opinion that some of us are faking it.

People believe I have Tourette’s when I do my ‘little’ tics. Squeaking, sniffing, blinking and the occasional word. But when it comes to more complex tics, this belief turns into the opinion that I’m faking it. I have strangled myself, run in front of cars, held my breath until I went blue, punched walls, gone under cars, kicked walls and even made holes big enough to go through (which I have also done). I have bit myself, scratched myself, punched myself and punched others. I insult people and shout. All of this is my Tourette’s - It is involuntary.

I have aspirations and goals. I love driving around by myself and doing various activities. If I were to do these tics by choice, this would all be in jeopardy. Why would I want to stop myself doing the things I love most? I have had tic attacks lasting up to 13 hours. If I were faking, there would be no way I’d manage to move violently non-stop for this long. I’d have to take breaks and I would be exhausted and no longer able to continue. Tourette’s makes it as essential as breathing, so the tiredness becomes irrelevant and I have no option but to carry on.

I don’t wish to endure pain nor inconvenience other people. Tourette’s makes me do it and I couldn’t wish any more for it to stop. Tourette’s doesn’t care if you’re tired, if you’re hurt, if other people are annoyed and frustrated. In fact, Tourette’s thrives on this. The pain, for my Tourette’s at least, is what makes it do more. It does give up after a while, and many people think this is coincidental. I can assure you it is not.

I have Tourette’s. I’m not attention seeking, I’m not faking. Remember, you can walk away but we can’t. People with Tourette’s have to endure the movements, embarrassment, exhaustion and pain every single day. We don’t get to stop when we are tired. We don’t get to take a break. You do, so please be patient